So, about a month after my D&C, I started to get the doctor’s bills. I’m fine with that, no problem. Insurance took care of a good portion of it, so it was not financially draining.
But, this is the a line our of the bill I received from the anesthesiologist’s office………. (again, names of people and places have been removed for their privacy.) Look closely….
Yep. It used the “A” word. Sorry, medical world…. I know in your minds, “abortion” and “miscarriage” are essentially the same thing…….. in MY MIND….. they are NOT. I did not have an abortion, nor will I ever. Why, oh why, oh why, would you phrase it like that on your patient’s bill?
If you have to code it that way on an insurance claim… FINE….. but do not send it to your patient that way! (And, as a side note… I’ve already gotten papers from insurance, and NONE of them use the word abortion.)
So, again, I took a few days to think about it. And, the best thing I could do was write them a note with their payment.
To Whom it May Concern…. (Their office name)…….
Very short, sweet, to the point. I hand wrote it, to hopefully grab someone’s attention. I said it was “medically correct” because–throughout my research, I found many sites that really do say it is the same thing. It’s just morally, it has way different meaning. And that’s where my hang up is. I can’t be the only person in the world who finds this phrasing in this context wrong!!! With all the attention that society gives to abortions……. you would think that doctors would shy away from using this phrase. But evidently not in this anesthesiologist’s office.
I mailed the note… and about a week later received a phone call from this office. They expressed their sympathies and said they had discussed this within the office and agreed to change their billing codes so that “abortion” would not appear on the patient bills anymore.
God worked in a mysterious way through me. My husband and I feel that this is why we suffered this loss…. to make some changes for the future…. to make life a little easier for others in a very difficult time.
So, if that’s the case… why is it still so hard for me?
I have had a regular period since my D&C. My husband and I are once again trying for another child. But, it’s slow going. I’m on day 42 of my cycle. I have taken a zillion tests… all negative. But, my period is no where in sight. The wait is killing me. I know that another baby won’t replace “June Baby” but it would certainly give me a little one to hold and love.
I miss my “June Baby.” I am blessed to have a sweet little boy here with me on Earth, but I desperately want to have more children.
I don’t know what is holding me back. I want to move on. But it’s so hard.
I hope that others around me, who are experiencing this along side me, can find comfort. And that I can do the same.