I Didn’t Fight A War

I didn’t fight a war

I lost a child

I didn’t see people die

I saw my son’s penis without a heartbeat

I never felt life fade in my arms on a battlefield

just in my womb on a table

The only bloodshed I saw was my own

so why?

Why do I feel so much pain?

Why do my days run together with no memory?

Why are my dreams filled with horror?

Why won’t the tears stop?

Why do I keep reliving that time?

Why can’t I let go?

Why can’t I be whole?

I didn’t fight a war

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About Unspoken Grief

Unspoken Grief is a non-profit website dedicated to creating awareness and resources for anyone touched directly or indirectly by miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal death.

©Unspoken Grief 2017; Devan McGuinness


Unspoken Grief exists to provide peer-to-peer support and resources. The information on this site is intended only for advocacy and educational purposes. It's not intended to give medical advice, to diagnose or to offer treatment for any medical or psychological conditions. Please consult your own health care provider for your own specific situation and needs.